Guest Post: The Love Walk, by Amanda Beth

I’m excited and blessed to have sweet sister in Christ, author Amanda Beth, on my blog this week. She’s a wife, homeschooling mom, writer, and an encouraging friend. I appreciate Amanda’s passion for sharing God’s Word and the love of Christ through her books and website, SharingTruths.com. Her latest book,The Love Walk, is a 15-week devotional based on 1 Corinthians 13. Today she’s sharing an excerpt from chapter seven: Love is Not Self-Seeking.

Chapter Seven: Love Is Not Self-Seeking

Selflessness does not mean “wanting to please others.” The Bible tells us to deny ourselves and lay down our lives for others, but if we learn from Jesus’ example, He didn’t live to please others. He lived to please God by doing His will, which was for the benefit of others.

In order to lay down our lives for the benefit of others we have to first lay down our will and submit it over to Jesus.

“And he died for all, that those who live should no longer live for themselves but for him who died for them and was raised again.” —2 Corinthians 5:15

After trying everything I possibly could in life, I hit a point when I gave up and said to God, “Here I am, Lord. If You can do anything with my life and have anything planned for me, I’m all Yours.” I stopped trying to plan my life and stopped seeking my own will. That’s when I opened the door for God to come in and live His will through me.

As we give ourselves to God, He works His love in us and enables us to love others. 1 John 4:7-8 says, “Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.”

Being married and having four young children who constantly need my attention, I sometimes feel like all I do is give of myself. At the end of the day there’s nothing left in me to give. I’ve learned that I need to spend time daily with God and allow Him to continually fill me with His love in order to continue giving myself to others.

We can’t give what we don’t have. We can’t give ourselves to others when we’re spiritually empty. Jesus often went without food to continue preaching and meeting the needs of others, but He never neglected His relationship with God.

“But Jesus often withdrew to lonely places and prayed.”  —Luke 5:16

We will be left spiritually and physically drained if we continue doing things for others without spending time with God, in His Word and in prayer, allowing Him to strengthen us and fill us with His love.

As we commit ourselves to God we can focus on loving others. God wants to fulfill our needs and desires while using us to bless others. I’m amazed how God meets my needs when He prompts me to commit whatever I’m facing over to Him and moves me to meet someone else’s need.

My husband and I were hit once with car trouble four consecutive times in a row. At the time, we’d drop one car off to be fixed and then something would happen to the other and then we’d have to switch them again. By the fourth time my car needed to be fixed, my husband suggested we wait since it was drivable, and we already spent all we had on the other repairs.

As the problem in my car continued, I began to fall into self-pity. Then one day, God humbled me by informing me of a couple who had gone through an extremely rough year, financially, emotionally, and physically. My problems didn’t compare to what they had been through.

I was moved by this couples’ situation and eagerly wanted to reach out and help them. I asked my husband if we could help even though we couldn’t afford it. My husband agreed, so I knew God was moving us to help them and He’d take care of us.

After blessing the couple, I got into my car, turned on the ignition and noticed the problem was gone instantly. I was amazed how God took care of our problem while using us to take care of someone else.

God wants to meet our needs and bless us, but when our minds are on ourselves we miss out on what God has for us and miss out on helping others.

There are many different ways God can use us to help others. When we follow the promptings of the Holy Spirit He will show us what people need. Like Jesus, sometimes what God prompts us to do won’t necessarily make us feel good or please others, but it will be what is needed.

I had to do something for someone once that was very difficult. I even prayed for God not to have me do it because I knew this person wouldn’t respond well. Nevertheless, I laid down my will and obeyed God. Even though this person wasn’t happy with me, I eventually saw the changes God brought about in their life. That showed me it was for their benefit.

People will not always approve of us when we live selflessly. But when we lay down our needs for the needs of others, and seek God’s will, lives will be changed, including ours!

“No one has greater love [no one has shown stronger affection] than to lay down (give up) his own life for his friends.” —John 15:13 (AMP)

Amanda is a wife of sixteen years, mother of four children, and author of “You Can Have a Happy Family” and “The LOVE Walk”. God has done an amazing work in her and her family since He rescued her twelve years ago. Because of His unfailing love, she is passionate about sharing His love with others. Every Monday she shares the wonderful benefits behind the truths in God’s Word on her blog (SharingTruths.com). Every Wednesday she shares the Word of God over prayer requests on her Facebook page (http://tinyurl.com/AmandaBeth). And every Sunday she is a guest contributor for Christian Blessings (PTL2010.com). She also shares messages on marriage and parenting on her website (AmandaBeth.net).

Threshold

I met him at the threshold, the place that opens into our home and closes out the world. Arms reach and we press tight. I know the width of his back and he the emotion soaking my damp cheeks. Our lips meet, not with the lust-filled lip lock of youth or the quick peck of peaked parents, but with the assurance and strength of mutual days, weeks, and years.

It’s a goodbye kiss overflowing with gratitude at beautiful, difficult years gone by, love built with a foundation of laughter and struggles and common dreams and little ones who wiggle and question and expand hearts beyond measure. It’s love framed with loyalty and respect, steeped in shared faith that He who began a good work in us will complete it until we see Jesus (Phil. 1:6).

It is patience and understanding and bright memories like raindrops falling on a stormy summer afternoon.

There’s healing in our embrace too, from difficult months and from life’s stampeding busyness. Too many missed moments and angry glares and sharp words, mostly mine. The threshold kiss acknowledges tough trials and personal hurt and selfishness just as it welcomes grace-filled promises of new mornings and new mercies. 

Sometimes, forgiveness tastes likes salty tears.

“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance…love will last forever!”

~ 1 Corinthians 13:4-8

We separate slowly, my tears coursing down cheeks he’s creased with smiles for nearly two decades.

“Here, honey.” I hand him the gray sweater jacket he forgot to pack, the one I dropped on the shoe basket as arms reached. The one he came back for, gifting me with a threshold kiss. He was soon boarding an airplane to New Orleans, climbing and tying ropes and learning how to inspect the entirety of bridges under his engineering care, and I’m still, always so proud of him.

But these 6 days are the longest we’ve been apart in 11 ½ years of marriage, and I grab his shirt one more time, press in close. Time reminds, always hurrying and sometimes unkind, and the echo and murmur of ‘I love you’ dance by my ear as he turns to leave.

I feel a moment of pained panic as I whisper ‘bye’ and shut the door, fighting back with the words of the apostle Paul, words inked on the Valentines card hiding inside his suitcase.

“I thank my God upon every remembrance of you.” (Phil. 1:3)

Thank You, Lord, for Trev. Thank You that through our imperfection and selfishness, You shine through to guide us in this beautiful covenant relationship, marriage. It’s so tough, so difficult at times to love like we’re supposed to, like Your Word tells us to, but it’s also beautiful and wonderful and worth it. Always worth fighting for. Thank You for the days and years of marriage that fill our hearts and keep turning us to You and make us realize that we’re better as one in You.