I have this drawer.
It’s inches from my pillow, haphazardly full and unorganized. Inside the drawer is a NIV Bible, the life-saving flotation device I gripped in my shaking hands during my first horrendous bout with anxiety and panic attacks a few years ago; two barely scribbled in, abandoned journals; various devotionals; sweet notes and artwork from our boys; a school picture of myself – except I’m a wide-eyed, nervous, first-year teacher; a couple of pens; a folder from the first women’s Bible study in which I prayed out loud; and a yellow sticky pad that’s just the right size.
Crevice and crack-filling sticky notes, scattered about the drawer like child-tossed confetti.
Dozens of rainbow-colored notes, no longer sticky but still bold with God’s word scrawled in pen or pencil. Notes I occasionally, reverently grasp in my fingers, remembering and thanking, my mind filling with awe as I wander the memory path of the last few years, years bubble-wrapped with grace and mercy and His FAITHFULNESS
though not always mine
(Forgive me, Lord).
Many of the verses are creased across my heart with the ink of life experience – of reaching out and trusting, believing, building a solid faith rooted in Jesus, a faith I prayed I could share with others through my writing one day.
Life-giving Words written on yellow and pink and blue.
Psalm 119:133…”Direct my steps by Your word, and let no iniquity have dominion over me.”
Psalm 84:11…”For the Lord God is a sun and shield; The Lord will give grace and glory; No good thing will He withhold from those who walk uprightly.”
1 Corinthians 2:5…”your faith should not be in the wisdom of men but in the power of God.”
Jeremiah 29:11-14…”‘For I know the plans I have for you,’ declares the Lord, ‘plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will listen to you. You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart. I will be found by you,’ declares the Lord.”
Psalm 34:4…”I sought the Lord and He heard me, and delivered me from all my fears.”
2 Corinthians 12:9…”And He said to me, ‘My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.'”
Among the sticky notes there’s also a personal note written by my paternal grandmother, Mimi. I received it in January, 2009, days after she passed away, though she had written the notes many years prior.
It’s a dainty piece of yellowed notepaper, folded in half, with ‘Kerry Anne’ written in careful cursive on the front. Mimi’s note is one of my favorite things on earth – a beautiful and meaningful treasure that she gifted to my sister and me – precious paper pieces of our soft-spoken grandmother and her heart for our lives.
Rereading Mimi’s simple note sets off shooting stars of familiar joy and gives me a gentle directive that God has used to remind me of my purpose for Him.
You have always been so sweet and thoughtful. I’ll always remember when you said, so sweetly and so concerned, “Are you sure you aren’t doing too much work?”
Please let Jesus use your thoughtfulness to help other people for His sake.
PS. Thanks for all the little love notes you’ve left for me, too!
Mimi’s words remind me that we each have different gifts and ways in which God leads us to share His grace with others. But the point is that His grace needs to be shared. Writing notes is genetic in my family, passed down from a mom and grandmothers who jotted words of thanks and wisdom and advice, and so I do, too.
So write a note, sharing words of encouragement or gratefulness with others, or jot down a verse that God used to help you cross a bridge of uncertainty into stronger, grounded faith. The words you write may fade on paper and with time, but they won’t fade in memory or in heart.